Business
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Vaseline Wins Award For “Most Unnecessary Product” In The World
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FAA Rolls Out “Ghostbusters” Clouds To Help Keep Controllers Awake
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Monster Apologizes For Accidentally Putting Air Traffic Controller Under “Jobs You Can Do In Your Sleep”
- Toyota’s Campaign Captures “Insecure Parents Who Care Too Much What People Think” Market
- Poland Spring To Tap Human Body For Water
- Dunkin Celebrates Black History Month, Sets Country Back 60 Years
Economy
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Unemployed Sneak Into Buildings During Evacuation Just To Feel Good
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Recession Forces Alcoholics Anonymous to Cut Steps
In response to the recent global recession, the organization Alcoholics Anonymous has been forced...
Entertainment
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20th Century Begins Production On “My Big Fat Greek Protestors”
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Bronx Zoo Cobra Makes Surprise Visit As Lorne Michaels Discusses Future SNL Hosts
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Bronx Zoo Cobra Pops Up As Guest Host On “The View”
- Scotland Yard Steps Up Security As Prince William And Kate Choose Cookie Wedding Cake
- Charlie Sheen’s “Magic Finger” Responsible For All Shooting Stars
- Jeopardy Says Computer Rematch Will Be All About Porn
Politics
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Perry Captures Hindu Vote By Powdering Face With Curry
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Disturbing Vote Worries White House
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Obama’s Eye Contact Blamed for Missing General’s Disdain
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Health
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Study Shows Exercise and Sex Increase Heart Attack Risk
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Study: Reaching for Alarm Clock With Eyes Closed Can Delay Waking
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Study Shows That Many Dolphins Are Just Shopping
Photos
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Winklevoss Twins Sue Over Size Of Microphone, Ask For One Hundred Million Gajillion Dollars
Because Nothing Says “We Care” Like A Lapel Mic
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Out Of Touch Gaddafi Accidentally Agrees To Asylum In Japan, Will Live Inside Fukushima Number Four Reactor.
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Photo News: Despite Negotiations, Gaddafi Says He Will Not Give Up Frown Lines
- Photo Reveals Fraternity Secret To Identifying Future Pledges
- “Dildog” Voted Woman’s Best Friend
- POTD – Cow Leans Into Photo
Travel
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FAA Rolls Out “Ghostbusters” Clouds To Help Keep Controllers Awake
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FAA To Have Pilots Help Controllers Stay Awake
Planes will now nose-up to control tower and get their flight instructions and controllers will...
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Airlines to Not Charge For Crapping Your Pants
Numerous airlines recently announced a new policy where they’ll charge passengers for the...
U.S.
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Courtroom Artist Clearly Not Friends With Attorneys
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Coast Guard Saves Money on Ships By Recruiting Buoyant Members
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A.A. Rolls Out New Banner for Blue People
February 18th, 2010 A spokesperson for the organization said Thursday “we believe that blue...
Other News
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World
Jong-il Invites Hikers On Camping Trip
Kim Jong-il, the leader of North Korea has graciously invited the two hikers recently released from Iranian custody to “camp” in his country. “They are welcome anytime” the leader says. “They don’t even have to do much, just find their way to the border and we will take care of the rest”. He went on to say…”oh yeah, and if you can, bring the hot chick too”.
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World
Libyans Try New Missile Deployment
Without the technology to launch missiles, Libyan rebel forces are now trying their luck at actually pulling the missile along deserted dirt roads towards areas still being controlled by government forces. Although the new method takes time, it is less detectable by overhead surveillance and is more accurate. “We can literally bring it right to the front step of our target and then pay someone to hit the tip with a hammer”. The rocket shown started it’s 5 mile journey [...]
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Politics
Perry Captures Hindu Vote By Powdering Face With Curry
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World
Italians Split On Knox’s Guilt,Unanimous On Hotness
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Economy
Unemployed Sneak Into Buildings During Evacuation Just To Feel Good
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Uncategorized
Washington D.C. Capitalizes On Earthquake By Selling Stuff That Broke
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World
Libya Celebrates Freedom By Saying Some Of the Creepiest Shit Ever
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Entertainment World
20th Century Begins Production On “My Big Fat Greek Protestors”
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